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Ashley Manta facetiously refers to it as “dropping the H-bomb” — telling new partners that she has herpes.She’s used to it now, but when she was first diagnosed nine years ago, it didn't feel so normal.She was convinced “no one would want to be with someone who has herpes.” Jenelle Marie Davis, founder of The STD Project, agrees. If you’ve just been diagnosed, you have a lot of options.She says that talking to new partners about the diagnosis is “the biggest fear people have going forward. has HSV-2, the virus that most often causes genital herpes, so you’re far from alone in tackling this diagnosis. You can continue to date the same way you did before the diagnosis, but you’ll have to tell people about your diagnosis before getting sexual with them.There are conflicting views about when to tell — and of course, you don’t need a one-size-fits-all strategy here. "I always have the herpes talk on the first date," Manta says."I find it’s easier to get it all out there so if it’s a deal breaker, no one’s time is wasted."The other option is to wait until you know the person better and have formed a connection."People don’t usually put all their cards on the table from the get-go, and why should that be any different just because you have herpes?
It’s not the physical symptoms people worry about, it’s how they’re going to date.” But they do date, and like all mental hurdles that at first seem insurmountable, you too will figure out how to make the big reveal. Or, if you’re not ready to have this talk, you may want to join a.
"That can be a nice jumping off point," Davis says.