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They just didn’t seem to understand why he wouldn’t straighten up, stop doing drugs, and get a job. Heck, if you want to give me ,000 a year, tax-free, for doing nothing, I might not work either.Finally, they decided to listen to us (Ed and me), and we put Ed in the middle between my parents and my brother, and he had to do certain things each month in order to get his money, which he had to get from Ed, not my parents.Questions and concerns regarding the article’s content can be directed to the authors or posted as a comment below.
Neither works well, and the tough-love approach is difficult to maintain, especially because you love them, and because there may be grandchildren in the mix, too. Not protecting them from their choices is also a good practice, because they have been protected for a long, long time if you are currently supporting them.
Reassuring yourself that this lifestyle is their choice, not some mythical “disease,” also helps you feel less guilty about ramping down financial support.
And he was given a schedule showing how the money was going to be decreased each month until it was no longer available. But slowly it started to work and today he is self-supporting and not doing drugs.
Because he is working again, not being supported by my parents, he has regained his self-respect and that is an important component in keeping him from going back to abusing drugs.
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