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China is relatively new to the whole modern-stable-globalized-internet (still working on that last one, really) country thing, and when your culture is over 4,000 years in the making, old habits die hard.Consider, too, the generational issue at play here: The lovely lady you’ve been crushing on’s parents and grandparents are the ones exerting that pressure to get married, even though she herself may not feel that she’s ready or interested.One of the primary issues here is that for Chinese women, there is a much stronger emphasis on getting married early.This goes back to less stable times, when marriage meant much-needed security, but of course this is by no means a purely Chinese phenomenon: In 2010, 44% of American women had married by age 25, but way way back in 1995, more than 59% had been hitched by 25.After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website.So we’ve gotten a few questions lately about dating in China.Your lady’s generation may well be the first to have that freedom of romantic choice, and that's something you need to keep in mind while making your decisions for your relationship – there simply isn't a ton of cultural precedent for her to fall back on.
Having been in Beijing more or less since July of 2010 (with frequent travel to other locales, of course), I've gotten pretty acquainted with the dating scene here in China.
I've been with a good number of girls, have had a few girlfriends, and – as I like to dabble in all things – have been sporadically active in the different expat communities in Beijing.
In fact, I moonlight as a rather well-connected man-about-town in the expat community here (or rather, I was doing so earlier this year… Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone.
So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating.
That's because her grandparents' and possibly (depending on where in China she is from) her parents still value marital stability above all else in their time, given the instability and volatility of their eras.In fact, I once dated a girl who would only meet up at places that her parents AND grandmother had pre-approved; as you can imagine none of these places were very fun.